Mental Access to MTKuszek

Mental Access to MTKuszek
A Window of Opportunity

Monday, June 21, 2010

06/21/10 Primal Vs. Intellectual

The 40th day

There seems to be two types of moods I tend to get into when I’m home with my family. There is the intellectual side of me that loves to be creative and work on projects and other cerebral pursuits. The other side is the primal side, the side that has desires and wants and pretty much is the survival instincts.

Now here’s the catch: the two cannot survive at the same time.

When I’m in the intellectual mood, I’m in high spirits and love working on what ever projects I’m doing (see my “too many projects” blog for the things I’m into), and in doing so, that primal side becomes suppressed. Often I don’t need sleep, food, recreation, or even procreation. My mind gets fixed on the task and I love every minute of it. My wife would disagree with me because one of the rooms becomes a workshop and some clutter occurs. My mind becomes ridiculously sharp as it gets some much needed exercise.

The primal side tends to come out when I’m really tired and worn out, usually closer to the end of the week. I tend to run on autopilot sometimes and just try to get through the day so that I can get to bed and sleep, which is my ultimate goal. Other than that, I tend to do the bear minimum to get by. My routines become simple and basic. Feed the kids, clean the room, keep the kids safe, take them outside, feed yourself, keep everyone clean, go to store, make dinner, etc. Free thought tends to get suppressed a bit and I really have no other desire other than to just get through the day. I don’t want to read, or work on any project that I may or may not have in mind.

So one day, I’m going to get this aspect of my personality in balance, but until then I guess I’m going to have to deal


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